Breastfeeding is the best and natural way to protect and bond with your baby, but it does not always come easily or as ‘naturally’ as we would have liked or expected.
Latching difficulties are common in the early stages, particularly if a baby has untreated tongue tie. Biting can start earlier than you'd expect. Flow, swelling, mastitis and leaks are also common problems. There are many feeding challenges that can make you feel less than adequate as a new mother. But they are all quite normal and there’s no shame in asking for help.
I attended our local breastfeeding clinics about 4-5 times in the first few months of my baby’s life. Although her latch was very good, she went through a period of crying profusely during evening feeds around 8-12 weeks (the witching hour, as some call it and as I now know) - and I felt terrible. Was there something I was doing wrong? Was I unintentionally harming my baby by feeding her wrong? Is there something I could be doing better? What am I missing? All these unanswered questions can really add to the confusion and anxieties of new motherhood, especially in these moments when your baby is crying and nothing seems to be helping.
The breastfeeding clinic was a great place to put my mind at rest. Although it didn’t quite answer all my questions (the witching hour is a bit like colic - a term used for a phenomena we don’t yet fully understand), it did make me feel less alone and more normal. It did put my mind at rest, so that I could focus on soothing my baby as best as I could while her body went through that tricky developmental stage and grew out of that loud evening phase.
Breastfeeding clinics are places around the UK (you can find the map here if you want to find one near you) providing support services for any challenges you might have feeling your baby, especially in these early stages. You can also use them for weighing your baby (although not all sites might have scales, so do check before going in for that) and for community chat - which can be just as helpful as the clinic itself (knowing that a lot of other new mothers share your challenges really helps and makes you feel less alone).
Other sources of support on your early breastfeeding journey include your health visitor, the La Leche League, lactation consultants, GPs and more. In the UK, if you’re not quite sure where to go, you can usually text the health visitor with your question - the number should be right on top of your red book.
There’s also direct advice from the community, of course; a lot of people ask questions about breastfeeding on the Peanut app I use and find quite helpful, for example. However, as much as I love the idea of the app, I would recommend using one of the professional sources for any feeding issues. You don’t want to overrely on the internet for medical info. At one point, when my baby was refusing to feed on the right side, I was at risk of mastitis and relying on the wisdom of the internet to help with that would have likely sent me into panic mode. So if you do take community advice into consideration when it comes to mothering decisions, take it alongside reliable medical info where necessary.
And ultimately, please remember that it’s ok to choose not to breastfeed your baby if your challenges feel too overwhelming or it’s simply too painful. Fed is best and your own wellbeing is very important.
